I Turned 30 This Year

I just sat down to write a recap of Tera’s 7th birthday, and I realized that I had not yet recapped my own birthday.

That was back in May.

This year I turned 30!

It felt like a really big deal to me.

And I really, really struggled with it, to be completely honest. I felt like I officially am not “young” anymore. And with that, I feel like I lost a lot of my identity! I know it sounds silly, but hear me out. I got married at 21- so young! I started having kids at 23- so young! I started fostering at 24- so young! My husband became a police officer and hit the streets at 25- so young! Everything I accomplished in my 20s came with the comment- so young! This isn’t a bad thing, it just is. And I felt like the moment I turned 30, none of my “accomplishments” would come with that label. I’m no longer “so young” to do anything.

I know that everyone over the age of 35 is hardcore rolling their eyes right now. I know- it’s so silly and there is still SO much life to be lived. I know that I don’t need to compare myself to anyone else who is hitting milestones at a different age than me. I know, I know. But I’m just explaining how I was feeling, not necessarily that my mindset was right.

Theo and I were also just coming off of our round of Covid and the kids were actually still in quarantine during my birthday (Theo and I were both deemed not contagious and had been back to work for a week or so). I was so very frustrated that even though we were no longer contagious, I just still wasn’t feeling well.

ANYWAYS- all that to say that I didn’t ever recap my birthday. I’ve always LOVED birthdays and I know that I will look back on the photos from this birthday and think fondly of the memories made. But I also wanted to record the fact that it wasn’t quite as easy and jovial as all these pictures might make it look! I am sure that we have all had a birthday that we just kind of struggled to accept. I am hoping that 30 will be my last one like that and I’ll be thrilled about all the rest 😉

My birthday started out with a surprise visit from some of my friends! They “kidnapped” me and took me to a park to walk around. After that we went out to dinner where even more friends joined us for a little surprise party. They even decked me out with a necklace and very flashy crown!

The week before my birthday, my parents came to visit us so that they could take care of our quarantined kids while Theo and I both were back to work. Trust me when I say that the enormity of that gift was not lost on me!

That Friday (the day before my birthday), I had a busy day since I was scheduled to speak at a high school girls retreat. The host even ordered a little birthday cake for me and we all sang. It was so sweet to be celebrated like that!

My parents left on the morning of my birthday, so we had a small celebration with them the night before they left. Nothing fancy- just dinner in the backyard and some angel food cake and birthday hats all around!

Everyone was officially out of quarantine on the morning of my birthday, so we went out for breakfast and then said goodbye to my parents as they headed back home. Theo took the kids and I for a hike at one of our favorite hiking grounds.

After a morning hike we headed home for lunch and I laid down for most of the afternoon as I wasn’t feeling well. Theo had texted all of our family and friends and asked them to take a short video saying happy birthday to me. I think about 30 people participated and sent a little video note saying happy birthday and many said something they appreciated about me. I watched the video curled up in my bed and just sobbed! It was so beautiful and was such a meaningful gift to Theo. I also felt completely emotionally spent after watching it and crying!! Ha!

And that evening we got some takeout and ate at a park and took a little walk together.

Now that I look back at these photos and memories I can see that I am so abundantly blessed to be welcomed into my 30th year of life with this family and these friends. I typically feel all excited and make a bucket list for the next year of my life, but this year there was none of that. And that is ok. I hope I can look back at this birthday as a time that I really struggled, but also grew the most.

And just for fun- I did write a blog post last year for my 29th birthday that listed 30 things I wanted to do before I turned 30. I looked back at the list and was going to publish it here, but it turns out I completed 12/30 of the list sooo we will just not post that here haha!