A Valentine’s Day Tea Party

Several months ago, Tera decided that she wanted to plan and host a Valentine’s Day Tea Party. I’m not sure where she got the idea from, but she has been to several women’s teas at our church and we have hosted a few parties at our house.

I told her she absolutely could plan and host a tea- but that she needed to be the ones to put it all together!

Well, she took that and RAN with it.

We sat down and made an invitation list then designed an invitation on Canva.

We then planned some food/snacks.

Next, we talked about certain activities that we could do at a tea party and what supplies we will need.

My Mom took Tera to the dollar store to buy decorations and all the supplies needed for her planned crafts. Tera also decided to put together goodie bags and grabbed some cute heart headbands for her guests.

The day before the party Tera baked some blondies.

The day of the party arrived and when we got home from church we kicked it into high gear setting up for the guests to arrive! Kiah REALLY wanted to be at the party, so he was also invited.

There were a few disagreements and arguments over who had to do the dirty jobs like wiping off the table. Tera sweetly delegated them to her brother, who immediately pushed back. We had to have a little sit-down conversation about how hosting a party means being the one who does the un-fun jobs like wiping off the table and cleaning up. All those jobs that the guests never know or see.

Up until this point, Tera had truly done all the work- the planning and the shopping. But when it came down to crunch time, the whole family pitched in to set up. Tera and Kiah set the table up. Theo hung the decorations and made the name plates. I whipped up a savory wrap snack and handled the food.

It did take a little bit of self-control on my part to not hover over the decorations. My minimalist soul was dying a little bit inside as we added more and more pink and red. But the kids were SO THRILLED with each and every item that they put on the table and even though it was beyond stuffed, it was stuffed with so many things that brought JOY to the kids and the guests!

We borrowed the mugs and teacups from one of our guests and the place settings were complete!

The guests started to arrive and I walked Tera through the various aspects of being a host, like greeting her guests at the door, taking their coats, showing them a comfortable place to sit, asking them if they need anything. While planning was her most comfortable role, she was more shy as a host and we worked together to host the tea party.

Our guests arrived and we all gathered around the table to eat so much yummy food and drink our tea!! We had two teapots with hot water and a tray full of various tea bags, chai, and hot chocolate. Each person chose their tea bag and then we poured the hot water into the cups for them.

We played a round of Table Topics and chatted while eating. Tera wanted to read a Bible verse, so that morning I had her sit down and use the concordance in her Bible to find verses on LOVE. She looked up 5-6 verses and picked two that felt fitting for our Valentine Tea Party. She read from Deuteronomy 6 and 1 John.

After our tea party, my Mom and I cleaned up the table while all the guests headed to the living room to make some Valentine cards for loved ones or play with the pets around the house.

One thing I loved about this tea party was that Tera invited just as many adults as kids- and the adults all accepted! That was so meaningful to me to see that Tera has so many mentors and grown ups in her life that love her and encourage her on in the right direction. The impact of that will be great and far-reaching.

All in all, I would say that Tera’s Valentine Tea Party was a huge success! We were all exhausted afterwards and now she truly knows the amount of work that goes into planning and hosting a party!

Tips for Letting Your Kids Plan a Party:

• Let them do it! Guide them, but don’t do it for them. I so badly wanted to add to her guest list, but instead let her think of who she wanted to invite
• Make them do the dirty jobs/hard work. Remind them that hosting a party is full of good fun- and also hard work! Let them experience that hard work
• Don’t downplay their decor or ideas. If they have a decor style, let them have at it! Don’t control that aspect of the party. If they have an idea for an activity and you think it’s dumb, don’t say anything. Let them do it and maybe it will end up being a hit, or maybe it will end up being a total flop. And that’s ok! Ideally, the people who are invited to this type of party are their “safe people” and so flops are also safe.
• Come alongside them, but don’t micromanage. Tera had myself or her Meemaw helping her every step of the way. But she truly did all of the work. We would ask a lot of questions like “Who do you want to invite?”, “What is one game that we could play?”, “What do you think we should eat?”, “Do you want to do red plates or flower plates?” etc.