Some people love, love, love every single minute of pregnancy.
Some people border on hating every single thing about pregnancy except the precious life that they are creating.
Some people are in between…some moment are pure delight, and some moments are not so much.
In case you can’t tell, I fall in the in-between category.
The miracle of life growing in me is AMAZING. I love feeling her kick, and knowing that God chose me to carry a little human, and to raise her! I don’t mind pulling the pregnancy excuses (you’re tired? did you grow a human today? hahaha), and the smiles and support (and dare I say: attention?) are also wonderful! However, some parts are just downright awful.
Tearing a round ligament, for example.
Yesterday, I woke up at 7:30 (on a Saturday), and was 100% ready to GO, GO, GO for the day. I’m a morning person, but not usually that excited to get up in the morning.
I started the day by making homemade doughnuts (first attempt = success!), then did 4 loads of laundry (washed, hung on the line and eventually folded). I also went through two bedrooms of our house, cleaning, sorting and organizing. The weather was beautiful so after lunch, Theo and I went for a long bike ride. Our bikes are both from the trash, so they are not exactly the best bikes for long rides..but it was still a blast and I loved every minute of it. After getting back from the bike ride, I went to the grocery store, then made two quiches and washed the dishes to finish off the day.
Today, I woke up in horrible pain. Of course, I flipped out, convinced that something was wrong with the baby, that it must be premature labor and that it was all ending now (I’m a worrier, what can I say?). We called Theo’s Dad (it’s nice to have a doctor on speed dial!), and after questioning me he said that it sounds like I tore a round ligament, and everything would be fine, I would just have to endure the pain. And painful it is. It’s kinda like tearing a muscle, but sharper and more severe. I can’t bend over, I can hardly walk and if I twist, roll over, or sit down I get shooting pain for about 5 minutes until it finally subsides. For those of you who don’t know, the round ligament is the muscle that holds the uterus in place. It does A LOT of work during pregnancy, and it’s actually really common for women to have round ligament pain or to tear this muscle.
So far, I’ve been treating pregnancy like I’m just a couple pounds heavier with precious cargo (aka, not changing too much of my lifestyle…still continue with regular exercise, regular routines, regular lifting of things, regular traveling, etc). This is like a huge wake-up call that I can no longer do it all. I’ve shed a few tears today…and not just because of the pain. Pregnancy is a really humbling experience, but one that I think is necessary to go through. God chose me (and Theo!) to carry this precious life, and I need to make that my priority. Of course, making that my priority means that I continue to exercise, to eat right, to sleep well, and go through every day remembering that God is the one who gave this life. It does not mean that I ‘do it all’, or even attempt to. It does not mean that I’m ‘the fittest pregnant woman’, or ‘the most high-energy pregnant woman’, or ‘the most stylish pregnant woman’. It means that I’m not comparing myself to other pregnant woman, or trying to out-do them in anything. It means I’m always looking out for someone else’s interests above my own, even though that someone else is not even born yet.
Oh, the lessons I’m already learning as a Mom…and I still have 4 months to go before I’m actually considered a Mom.
And, just for your enjoyment….since I have been laying flat on my back (or my rear) all day long, I’ve had lots of time to browse Pinterest!
Hope you all had a great week!
Say a prayer for me, that this pain will subside and I will be able to get through the work week!