I don’t know about you, but I feel like the last few weeks of pregnancy are so hard partly because by the end we are ready to do ANYTHING to get that baby out of our bodies.
If you are pregnant, there is one thing that is inevitable: that baby needs to come out.
Now how that baby gets out is up to you, your family, your doctor and God.
Homebirth, Natural birth in a hospital setting, birth center, epidural, C-section…they are all ways to get that baby out!
No matter what the method of birth, there are still a number of ways to prepare our bodies to deliver that baby. I will confess that I didn’t do all of this perfectly throughout my three pregnancies and deliveries, but I will say that when I did do these things, it made all the difference.
- Exercise. So often during pregnancy, we hear all about how we need to sit down and rest and take it easy, but really that is not the best advice, unless the pregnancy requires some sort of bedrest. You see, pregnant women are about to “run a marathon”, and who would ever sign up for a marathon without training? Instead, we need to train our bodies to withstand hours of labor. Strengthening the back, the legs and even the arms is SO helpful for labor and it even helps with recovery! However, it is important to be exercising all throughout the pregnancy so that the body can adjust accordingly.
- Proper Nutrition. Another thing that we seem to avoid during pregnancy is proper nutrition. We claim “cravings” and “eating for two” and tend to let our nutrition slide. For me, I was sick the entire pregnancy with Ezra and that led to poor nutrition and not taking my vitamins, which ended up leading to severe anemia near the end of my pregnancy. Instead, when pregnant, we should be careful about what we are consuming since everything we take in also affects a human life growing inside of us. We need to be diligent about taking vitamins and making sure that we consume protein.
- Have a Birth Plan, but hold it loosely. Maybe it’s just because I’m type A, but I have found a birth plan absolutely necessary as I go into the weeks leading up to the birth. It helps me to know what I want and what I don’t want. However, that being said…a birth plan also needs to be held loosely, because anything can happen in a birth. It can be dangerous to have a birth plan and refuse to change that birth plan at any point during labor and delivery. I found that having my birth plan but also including “if this, then that”.
- Mental Preparation. I think this might be one of the most important factors in preparing for a birth! While birth is so very intense physically, it’s also a very intense mental game. I found that reading birth books really helped to get me in the right headspace. I needed thoughts like “I can do this”, “Other women have done this”, “I am capable” in my head rather than “10 cm is a big stretch” and “I don’t think I can do this”. Having the right mental state was absolutely the make or break it in my labors. I think that my labor with Ezra was so much harder because my head wasn’t quite in the game.
- Support Team. I will say this once, and I’ll say it loud: YOU CHOOSE WHO YOU WANT IN THE ROOM. The team of people who are in the room are crucial during delivery. Some women love to have a party in the room while they labor, some prefer just their husband. For me, my support team consisted of my husband and my doula (and my rockstar nurses!). If my Mom was on this side of the ocean, she would have been in there, too. My support team also consisted of the people who watched my older kids while I was in labor, since as a mother I tend to worry about them and what they are doing. Having someone I trusted to take care of my older kids made such a difference during my labor. I would say that it’s very important to know this beforehand and clearly communicate it to those in your life who may be expecting an invitation to be in the room with you.
- Know your stuff. I find this to be the point that most of us usually miss out on (me included). It’s very important to do research and know how the entire process from beginning to end works. This includes labor, delivery and all the fun stuff afterwards. Sure, head knowledge is so much different from experiencing it, but I found that having that head knowledge helped me out throughout the whole process. Know the stages of labor, know what types of interventions mean. Know what shots are given to the baby after the birth, and if you plan to accept them. Know your rights to refuse and your rights to ask questions. I’ve gone through three births now, and it was on this final third baby that I felt more comfortable asking “why are you pressing on his tummy?” or “where is the stitch that you are putting in me?” or “will I die when I have my first postpartum poop?”. For some, having all this knowledge might lead to more fear, and it is ok to know your limits and not over-research or be a know it all. But we. need to at least know the basics and be the one who is in charge of our own labor, delivery and postpartum. It’s a delicate balance to take into the account the wisdom and experience of knowledgable doctors, but also to know why and how they are recommending things to go certain ways.
Even though I’ve had three natural, unmedicated deliveries, I wanted this post to be for everyone out there who is having a baby. You might have expected to find breathing techniques or a rant about how you should give birth. I wanted instead to provide everyone with the tools to prepare your minds and bodies for having a safe and healthy delivery- no matter the method to getting that baby out!
What are your recommendations for preparing to deliver a baby?
I would say pretty much the same things. Preparing for labor starts as soon as you find out your pregnant. Exercise, nutrition, and the last few months working on getting the baby into a good position can all be really helpful when it’s actually time. I do think it’s good to sit down and get some rest too, though, to help deal with pain throughout pregnancy and at the end so you’re not exhausted when it’s time for labor. And I do think that sometimes it’s all you can do to just keep something down and survive through one more day so sometimes good nutrition just isn’t very possible, unfortunately. But I’m not a fan of acting like I have no control over cravings and the nutrition I’m getting just because I’m pregnant.
It is soo nice to have the security of a good birth team. I have always had my husband and midwife (and her people). My mom was also at the first two. But what I have needed from my team has been different with each birth. I needed a ton of help and support the first time. I think I tired them all out. The second time, Noah and I were laboring together while my mom and the midwife were chatting in the other room (until pushing/postpartum). My third, I mostly didn’t feel like I needed any involvement from anyone until it was time to push/postpartum. My fourth I had midwife support via text while I labored/miscarried at home by myself, with Noah’s support as needed and my sister-in-law taking care of the kids as needed. I also had an ultrasound at home by a tech who does home visits. All these supports made a big difference and made me feel cared for and more at ease.